Even though

Even though I'm sick
Even though I cry
Even though I ache
Even though I lie
Even though I pretend
Even though I'm scared
You see me, just me, truly me
You know me, and you care.

Falling..

Hard.

Tripped out the gate.

I never thought my life, as simple as it has always been,
could ever become as complicated (at least through my eyes) as it currently is.

You're slowly killing me
And I wish it wasn't true.
I really do.
But it seems like
I'm so into you?

Everything seems to hurt. It all seems to worry.
Though about 99% of me feels like theres no hope at all
Concidering my life doesn't consist of much need for hope.
That small 1% is still stuck in the back of my mind.
Wondering if a time of day will ever arrive.
For it to be released.
For it to run wild.

Alison Wonderland.. perhaps?

And there's a part of me that knows i'm everything you need
But i'm afraid to let you in
Afraid of what you'll see

And now i'm falling even harder for the boy i really know :)

Oh, Mirror in the sky.. What is love?

My stomach is in knots just thinking about it.

How is it possible to distinguish from a friendship and something more?
Is there a code name that's said?
Are there signs that I'm missing?
Or maybe it's just all in my head.
Maybe its just the thought of it, that makes me crave it.

Or maybe it's something more.

Leave me be.

I. Don't. Understand.

Two people, 21 years, 10000 questions of how they are completely opposite.

One wants me to dream. They believe in me, believe in my hopes and dreams, and have hope that i'll one day, maybe even soon, be able to accomplish those on my own. They give me confidence and credibility for my strengths. They give me hope.

The other wants me to live life as they lived. Inspirationless, dreamless, hopeless. They have no idea of what I'm saying because they've never had ambitions like I have.

This makes no sense.
My head hurts from this absolute nonsense.

But you know what?

My life. Is NOT hopeless.
And dreams will come true.

Royalty doesn't compare to this

It's difficult to say that my family doesn't annoy me half the time.
I automatically think "Oh God, Give me some peace!" when someone's about to open their mouth.
Though I know they are exactly like me, so I shouldn't talk.
But I do talk. And I guess that's just who I am.

But I really should acknowledge them more.
They do so much for me, keep me together.
Like a superhero.
Saving the world, one helping task at a time.

If it werent for family, there'd be no way I'd get to actually reach my dreams.
Travelling, in particular, would be out of the question.
Not for my crazy Parenteau clan.
They believe that acting in the moment is the best way to live life.
The only option.
The fact that I'm actually the second Parenteau girl to travel to Europe is kind of outstanding.
The fact that I have so much more freedom in this world than my other sibling is crazy.
The fact that I'll be travelling with my closest cousin to DisneyWorld this summer is unbelieavable.

Unbelievable, yet realistic.

Beauty is blind, until you live with that beauty.